Thursday, November 12, 2009

The Girl Wind Burning Acquired

photo by Becci Erickson, 2009
 
 
Weather Vein
All I remember is the girl
blown clean off the prairie,
and just that wind
going for days now
like it wants to tear
you loose, wipe you fresh
clean out of commodity.
The bulging air releases
into this. A tension spins
and slips, plunging
earthward. Someone
(the girl the ghost the shape
that passes through us?)
reminds us there is someone
else (and a wind to tack into
a lofted direction).
Something
(the blood rushing our ears?)
rattles up our insides
right along the spine,
to remind us we can be captured
yet, mid-sentence, can be swayed,
and my small grammar lifts
and folds,
hardly heard
in the vein of It. 
 
 
- originally published in Poetry Northwest
 
Tonight I initiated the first step of what is likely to be a big change in my life. As my practice has intensified over the last few months, I have come to realize that the contentment I was hoping for in my life just wasn't there, even though I have worked awfully hard to reach it. Intriguingly, I don't know where the winds are taking me yet, but know that my roots are in my practice and that the practice is my guide. To be honest, there is some fear, but not as much as you might think. This is a bit of a surprise to me, given that I've always had a clear sense of where I was heading since I was 17. The posting of this blog is my way of recognizing and honoring this first step on a new journey. At this particular moment, I am enjoying the not knowing, a sense of hope, the smell of a fresh breeze. Well, maybe "breeze" isn't quite the term for it, but it's close enough. 
 
For fun, while visiting another website a few days ago, I decided to click on the link below to find out what my buddhist name is. I'm not actually qualified to have a Buddhist name, but this site generates them randomly. My Buddhist name is The Girl Wind Burning Acquired. What's yours? If you try it and get the same thing let me know. Maybe the site was rigged. 
 
Note: I'll be polishing up the site in the next couple of weeks. Adding widgets, improving. For now, I just wanted to post.

10 comments:

Walkinghorse said...

Happy blog birthday! Look forward to reading more. :)

Signed with my Buddhist name,

Great Teacher Earnest Eye

Lothar said...

What an achievement! Congratulations!

Dirk Johnson said...

Love this post! Did you not take refuge and receive a name? Or is that not part of the Zen process? Forgive my ignorance. My Buddhist name is Thubten Lodro Gyurmed Trinly, which is actually a combination of the refuge names given me by H.H. Penor Rinpoche and Khenpo Gyurmed Trinly. Since Khenpo gave me his own name and since H.H. Penor Rinpoche was at the time the supreme head of the Nyingma, I couldn't leave either of them behind so I combined them. I'm not really qualified for even one, either, but there it is. They gave them to me anyway and I have two (besides the secret ones from empowerments, but that's a whole other story, lol).

Buddhist At Heart said...

Hi Happiforever!

My Buddhist name is Bodhisattva Mother Increasing, so at least it generates two different names, probably more LOL. I'm not qualified to have one, either, BTW.

Loved your poem and first post. I think you are right, the roots are in practice and practice should be your guide. With that as a guide, you can't go far wrong. I wish you the best in your future and future blogging!

Happi said...

Lothar -

Thanks! I hope you come visit again soon.

Gisela

Happi said...

WalkingHorse -

Again, the name choice amazes me. Seems like a great fit to me. Thank you so much for stopping by.

Gisela

Happi said...

Dirk -

Thanks for visiting. As part of the group that started me writing again last Spring (not to mention the example of your own great site) you are partly responsible.

As far as the Zen path, I'm still a beginner (and hope to keep that mindset for quite some time. I'm sure I'll get a 'real' name eventually. Though I really like this one.

Gisela

Happi said...

Hi BuddhistAtHeart -

I like your name too. The names I've seen so far all seem to fit in some magical way. I also have the same question about the different ways mine can be interpreted, but enjoy it being that way.

Thanks for stopping by and your words of encouragement on the poem, the post, and most importantly, the path. I look forward to seeing more of you.

Gisela

zendirtzendust said...

YAY! I was hoping that you would have a blog. Love the post. Don't worry abut the Dharma name. I've been sticking with my own for a while but I suppose an unofficial one would be fine.

Cheers,

John

Happi said...

John -

I've been hoping to for quite awhile. Thanks for stopping by and signing on.

Gisela